January 15, 2013

Downside of Doing, Upside of Being

5/4/2010: To-Do List

5/4/2010: To-Do List (Photo credit: john.schultz)

Do you think our society and children are lost in technology, endless “to do” activities, and low-road behaviors that limit human potential?   Perhaps we have been neglecting our core self that yearns for peace of mind, happiness, harmonious relationships, and inner growth.  We may be temporarily lost in “doing” if we don’t have enough time and are stressed out, concerned about our health,  experiencing relationship conflicts, feeling bewildered, or wondering about the meaning of life. Practical neuroscience insights and ideas help us navigate a balance between doing and being, thus living a higher quality and purpose driven life.

Differences between Doing and Being

“Doing” involves daily activities like getting to work, working your “to do” lists, following instructions, responding to distractions, solving problems, dealing with relationship dynamics, attaining goals, and staying healthy. Most people can relate to and explain the importance of “doing;” indeed, it is an essential component of practical living. It may be helpful to view “doing” as content, and “being” as context. Where people go astray is by placing their “doing” activities on a high plateau, mistakenly thinking they are the most important aspect of their lives; this condition can be likened to the metaphor, “can’t see the forest for the trees.”

“Being,” on the other hand, is a bit deeper and more philosophical. It has to do with “who you are,” “why you are here” and “how you can best live the life you have been gifted with.” “Being” involves your state of mind (e.g. positive or negative), your values and beliefs, and how you want to treat yourself and others. There is a huge spectrum of choices ranging from “high-road being” (e.g. grateful, kind, caring, loving, empathetic, patient, forgiving, respectful, helpful, cooperative) and “low-road being” (e.g. mean, abusive, dictatorial, judgmental, opinionated, angry, disrespectful, righteous, competitive, narcissistic).

Downside of Doing

The downside of “doing,” in the absence of consciously choosing a state of “being,” includes:

  • Getting lost in physicality
  • Ignoring your well-being
  • Damaging relationships
  • Bringing out lower road behaviors
  • Regretting, later, that you were capable of being a better person
  • Delaying  inner growth and peace of mind

Upside of Being

“Being” is a choice. You decide which high-road behaviors you will consistently exhibit on a 24/7 basis. Making a conscious choice of how you want to live your life, and influence others, requires courage.

  • Being the best you can be
  • Being true to yourself
  • Being the captain of your life
  • Living a purpose-driven life
  • Having a positive impact on yourself and others
  • Growing and experiencing the fullness of life

How to Balance Doing and Being

Most people start with the “doing” component; this is a dead-end street. Begin with the foundational and contextual “being” side of life. Decide on one or two central themes for “how you want to be.” Think of what legacy you want to create; imagine what you want people to say about you when you are no longer here. Be realistic and select the highest values and behaviors you can sustain each and every day. Pick those that resonate strongly with you, do no harm, and serve yourself and others. Try them for a week or two, then experiment with new states of being to replace choices that didn’t feel quite right and were difficult to sustain. Let feedback from your inner self and others guide your choices.  You will find this process fun and fulfilling.

In summary, “being” defines “who you are,” and not “what you do.”  “Being”   is the tapestry, territory and landscape in which you live, work, relate, learn and grow.  The ideal combination is to be the best person you are capable of being, and superimpose the things (doing) you need to accomplish to navigate life; this provides flow, beauty and elegance to living life to the fullest.

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January 11, 2013

Closing the Gap Between Intention and Action

English: New Year's Day postcard mailed in 190...

English: New Year’s Day postcard mailed in 1909. It reads: “A New Year’s Resolution / Jan. 1st / Good Resolution / Each resolution that I make / My conscience surely troubles / Because I find they always break / As easy as Soap bubbles” (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

A startling statistic is that only one in twenty, who make New Year resolutions, succeed in achieving their desired outcomes.  If you are amongst the 95% trying to close the gap between intentions and action, practical neuroscience is your bridge to success.

Intentions are ongoing throughout the year. Perhaps people wait for the New Year to make changes, as it is a time-honored tradition and New Year’s Day is a symbol for a “fresh slate” or “new beginning.” Why not look at each day as the best day to be the best you can be, and to improve your quality of life?

It seems that most people tend to launch into making resolutions quickly and emotionally, without going through a brain-based approach that exponentially improves the success rate. It’s all too easy to make grand and noble resolutions; it’s another matter to experience success at keeping them. This is where guilt and embarrassment set in, particularly if you make your resolutions visible. Then, the process of making future resolutions becomes even more difficult and burdensome because you’ve programmed yourself with negative memory imprints.

It may be helpful to think about intentions as the “starting point” for resolutions. Visualize your intentions as filling Hoover Dam with positively charged water; as the potential energy builds, the pressure increases to the point where you need to release it (action). Saying aloud and visually documenting your intentions kicks your brain in gear to think, see, feel and hear (through your internal voice) the benefits and outcomes of your intentions.  Your brain will consciously and unconsciously work on establishing goals and action plans if the outcomes are satisfying and sustainable.  Natural repetition of the process strengthens motivation through neuroplasticity as you fill your “Hoover Dam Brain;” this renders willpower unnecessary.  If natural repetition ceases, you can assume that the “value equation” of your intentions were sufficiently low; this is a gift from your brain and you can start over with a different set of intentions in a guilt-free manner.

The key to success is to stay with the “intention process” for hours, days and even weeks; you will go on autopilot if your brain is sufficiently motivated. It’s essential to document your thoughts and ideas; these building blocks are subject to review, analysis, change, removal and new additions. Visual documentation fuels repetition.   Contrasts are made, below, between intentions that rarely succeed and those that catalyze action and success.

Intentions That Rarely Succeed

  • Impulsive: These are statements or resolutions you blurt out, perhaps while in an emotional state. They are rarely written down, analyzed and processed logically or imaginatively.
  • Low-Value: Your brain only engages voluntarily if there is high and enduring value. Willpower often loses the battle when the value equation is in question.
  • Purely Selfish: It’s unlikely others will support you if they don’t receive some positive benefits themselves.
  • Too Many: It’s better to triage your intentions/resolutions so you have adequate time to put your brainpower to work on completing one change before beginning another.
  • Situational: You will be out of alignment if the situation that sparked your intention/resolution changes. It’s good to assess if what you want to change is something that will be satisfying for “all seasons.”
  • Negative Mood State: Intentions established during a negative mood state are charged with negative energy. This imprint may block returning to the intention process in a calm and clear mental state.
  • Not Visually Documented: The likelihood of success is multiplied when you visually document your intention/resolution process.
  • No plan: When there is no plan, there is frequently the absence of action; when there is no action, there is no visible change.

Intentions That Succeed

  • Positive Mood State: Create and process your intentions and resolutions while in a positive mood; this charges your “inner space” with positive energy that facilitates the intention process in a smooth and positive manner.
  • High-Value Outcomes: High value outcomes keep your brain engaged and focused. If you lose interest quickly, it’s a sure sign that the value equation is low.
  • Long-Term Benefits: Your brain stays engaged as long as there are favorable outcomes. Long-term benefits plus high-value outcomes are a sure-fire way to keep your brain working without having to call forth willpower.
  • Mix of Intrinsic and Extrinsic Rewards: Intrinsic rewards include improved relationships, expressing and experiencing kindness, caring and doing the right things.  Extrinsic rewards come and go and are insatiable.
  • Repetition: Frequent visits with your intentions/resolutions strengthen them through neuroplasticity; you will   naturally go into autopilot to achieve high-value outcomes, having long-term benefits and rewards.
  • Other People Benefit: You will receive support and compliments from others, when your intentions do no harm and other people can experience your success. They will likely ask you, “How did you do it?”
  • Create a Plan: Stay with the process of documenting outcomes, benefits and rewards before establishing action plans and measurable goals.  You will know when you are ready to create the plan.
  • Work the Plan: This is the simplest and most natural step because all the prior steps naturally catalyze action. You have now closed the gap between intention and action.

In conclusion, it’s never too late to make and manifest meaningful resolutions; there is no better time to start than now. Begin the process of thinking about your intentions; say them aloud and write them down. Keep adding thoughts, feelings, ideas, outcomes, benefits, beneficiaries, goals and action plans to your documentation. This “living process” is the real-world mechanism for change using intention-based resolutions. This practical neuroscience methodology is bound to be more successful and fun than the methods used by the 95% of people, who fail in making and keeping their resolutions.

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December 22, 2012

Happy Holidays!

Stephen and DeannaHoliday Greetings to our readers, friends and customers,

Before the year comes to a close, Deanna and I want to express our heartfelt thanks for our readers and customers of Brain PathWays™. The follows, likes and comments are appreciated and we hope you have found value in our posts throughout the year.

Helping improve your quality of life is our passion and life pathway. We have been creating practical neuroscience tools, products, articles, workshops and certification programs for individuals, business, education and government since 1992. As of today, you have a “library” of 103 practical application articles in categories including Relationship Success, Career Success, Academic Success and Personal Development. We are committed to carrying on our tradition of helping people “be the best they can be” in the weeks, months and years to come.

Our worldwide customers and readers know that the practical neuroscience tips and strategies we pass along to you freely, are based on knowing and leveraging your brain strengths. Your personalized and comprehensive online report is based on a quick, easy and fun, statistically validated survey.

Have you considered gifting people you care about with a Brain PathWays™ report? Who do you know who wants to improve a personal relationship, repair or kick-start their career, reduce stress, make better grades and get directionally aligned with their life purpose? Thousands of people like you have been amazed at how their lives have improved, as a result of their personalized and practical tools based on their brain strengths. It’s a foundation on which to build a better life; sharing this gift with the people closest to you is the best way to improve communication and harmony at home.

We hope you’ll consider the Brain PathWays™ personalized report full of practical neuroscience strategies for your last-minute gift giving. Just click the link to learn more and purchase gifts with instant delivery! www.brainpathways.net

Special Offer: For everyone who orders a Brain PathWays™ report between December 22, 2012 and January 22, 2013, we will email each of you a FREE offer to ask us three questions of your choosing about your report results.  Deanna and I will personally craft responses to your questions about your personal relationships, career challenges, life aspirations and any topic we can address from your report results.

Wishing you, your family and friends a peaceful and happy holiday,

Deanna Phelps and Stephen Hager

Founders and Managing Directors

The Hadron Group

Creators of brain-based human development products since 1992

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December 21, 2012

Displacing The #1 Obstacle to Positive Thinking and Living

road_block.jpg

road_block.jpg (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Many practitioners of positive thinking “hit the ceiling” after making notable progress. Don’t be alarmed or disturbed.  First, give yourself a big pat on the back and be grateful for the gains you have made. You’ve already proven to yourself and others that safe, practical neuroscience practices work.  You may be ready to displace a big obstacle that frees you to attain high-altitude positive living.

The #1 Obstacle to Positive Thinking and Living

The #1 obstacle to positive thinking and living is judgment. It’s mostly an unconscious state of mind that inputs, creates, interprets and expresses beliefs, values and mental models that impede a positive mental attitude.  We all have and hold judgments (reactions from prior programming and life experiences); some give us positive outcomes, others yield negative effects. The ones that yield negative effects are the ones eligible for displacement.

Forms of judgment are many and varied. They include developing quick and faulty opinions with little reliable information, taking a hard-line position and then defending the position or attacking others having contrary opinions. Another form of judgment comes from buying into another person’s negative programming, without holding his or her beliefs up for scrutiny.  Perhaps the most devastating form of judgment is self-judgment; this includes holding and internalizing personal guilt about something you think you did wrong or should have done differently. Blaming and condemning others for their acts is also deleterious to one’s positive mental state. Judgment escalates and gets stronger when other people support your opinions; this is where righteousness sets in and often becomes as solid as concrete.  Thankfully, all forms of judgment that yield negative outcomes can be dissolved and displaced without dynamite or war.

You may experience internal resistance to analyzing your judgmental nature; this is expected because of the innate nature of the ego. Mr. and Ms. Ego thrive on being “right;” it’s a major source of distress and discord in relationships and causes blockages to achieving peace of mind and manifesting good things. The truth is that an ego that is less judgmental and dominant is a happier ego; this is subjectively experienced by practicing the suggestions that follow.

The Course In Miracles (published by the Foundation of Inner Peace) is a book to assist its readers’ practice of non-dualistic forgiveness in everyday life. Lesson #121 states that “Forgiveness is the key to happiness.” Forgiveness may be your big solution to chronic fear, anxiety, depression, relationship problems, career blocks and general unhappiness brought on by judgment. Even “conditional forgiveness,” (e.g. forgiving some people and situations, but not everyone and everything) results in more positive thinking and favorable living.

Displacing Judgment

The first step to displacing judgment and being more forgiving is to understand more about how our brains work. The second step is to practice simple and safe methods that expand positive thinking for a better and more peaceful life.

There may be more going on than what you see, hear and think. Your brain programming, from childhood to the current moment, drives your behavior. If you are attacking or defending a position or condemning/judging people, you are likely “under the influence” of prior programming. When assessing individuals and situations, there is virtually no way of knowing the full context, concealed prior events, people’s true intentions, and what they are thinking. Even if you are “right,” holding on to anger, resentment, and negative feelings does no good for anyone.

Ask: What’s going on here? What are my feelings? What beliefs do I hold about this situation? Are my beliefs serving me well? Is there something new I can learn? Could it be that I am mistaken?  What might bring me clarity and peace of mind? Can I release my negative emotions and move to a more neutral place?

Remember:  There’s more going on “under your hood” and in the brains of others than you can ever comprehend. You are only taking in small microbursts of information because prior programming filters and distorts what is going on.

Actions:  Suspend judgment by putting your brain in “neutral gear.” Ask open-ended questions, listen, observe, and learn.  Keep an open and flexible mind.  Give yourself the gift of changing your mind if new information and thinking yields better outcomes. Rather than attack and defend, role model your beliefs in ways that no one gets hurt.

Everyone is doing the best they can. The first qualification to this statement is that people are doing the best they can based on their states of mind, environment, awareness, available resources and choices; this includes you. The second qualification is that everyone is capable of doing better; this includes you, as well. Positive change comes from up-shifting thinking and behaviors to higher levels. The process requires letting go of outdated beliefs and replacing them with ones that serve you and others better.  If this were not true, how else could the human race attain higher levels of peace, happiness and quality of life? By accepting this logic, even partially, you are on the pathway to suspending judgment and entering into the world of forgiveness.

Ask:  Am I being unduly harsh on myself and others? Can I accept that everyone is a work in-progress? Does my judgment of myself and others help or hinder? Am I willing to give myself and others an opportunity to improve? How would I feel if I experienced growth and improvement?

Remember: Everyone is doing the best he or she can, despite outward appearances. Anyone can improve if they see the benefits, are in a positive state of mind, and have support and resources. We are all works in-progress; some people are much further ahead on the continuum of development than others are. There are always people behind and ahead of you.

Actions: Suspend judgment. Move toward forgiveness by being nicer and kinder to people you disagree with. Show respect and try to understand their points of view. It’s possible that these actions will up-shift them to higher-road thinking and behaviors. Focus on self-improvement rather than on trying to change others; this “butterfly effect” will surely make a difference.

Special Personal Note: The most important person to forgive is yourself, regardless of what you may have done or didn’t do; acknowledge it, claim responsibility and then let go of the guilt, knowing you did the best you could. Then, take positive action to correct the wrong by using higher-road behaviors as a way of life. This simple sequence off-loads tons of guilt and elevates your self-esteem.

In summary, continue improving your positive mental attitude with foundational “high-road” affirmations, positive self-talk, and by reversing negative thoughts to their positive counterparts. When you “hit the ceiling” and progress is impeded, examine your programming that creates different forms of judgment. Practical neuroscience principles and The Course in Miracles demonstrate that “forgiveness is the key to happiness.” Suspending or completely eliminating judgment skyrockets you to high altitudes of positive thinking and living. You can do it!

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December 19, 2012

Gratitude…The Staircase of Positive Living

Stairs

Stairs (Photo credit: jeremydeades)

I’m wondering how many of you have felt alone and lost in the “basement level” of your brain, and didn’t know how to escape from the clutches of your negative feelings and thoughts. It’s a yucky and miserable experience.  We all have some knowledge about the power of a positive mental attitude; conversely, we also have experienced the effects of negative mental attitudes. Can you see that your mental attitude is a two-sided coin?  Is it possible you have a choice of where you want to live in terms of your mind state? If you believe you can become the “captain of your life,” the following practical neuroscience-based suggestions will help you climb stair steps to get positive and stay positive.

Getting and Staying Positive

Gratitude is the staircase of positive living. The first step is identifying everything you are grateful for. Consider organizing and recording these by categories on colored index cards.

  • Life: This includes breathing, sight, hearing, movement/touch, smell and taste. Even Helen Keller, without sight or hearing, lived a positive and productive life through gratefulness and the power of positive thinking.
  • Relationships: List the people who love and support you. Who do you know that reaches out to you and tends to be cheerful, helpful and non-judgmental?
  • Learnings: What have you learned from life experiences, which give you peace of mind and inner joy, regardless of outer-world happenings? These intrinsic learnings are, perhaps, the most important resource for a sustainable, positive mental and emotional attitude.
  • Gifts: What are you good at doing that gives you healthy satisfaction? Examples may include art, music, good listening skills, caring about people, sense of humor, being positive and helpful.
  • Environment: Consider where you live, available amenities, aesthetics, weather and nature.
  • Possibilities: What do you imagine in your mind’s-eye that elevates your mood state when you are feeling down? What are your most outrageous and wonderful dreams of what life can be like?

You probably have observed that there are few, if any, categories for extrinsic areas of gratitude; these have been deliberately excluded, as they are transitory and do not provide a sustainable positive mental attitude. This is not to say that money and physical possessions are not good or valuable; they merely come and go and rarely provide long-lasting peace of mind and fulfillment. Perhaps this is an underlying reason why so many people are negative and in pain.

Emergency First Aid Steps

  • Positive Affirmations: “I feel healthy! I feel happy! I feel terrific!” is a daily mantra recommended by Clement Stone and Napoleon Hill in their 1960 self-help book entitled Success Through a Positive Mental Attitude. Use this affirmation until you construct one that resonates better with you.
  • Reach Out and Ask for Help: When you are feeling low, lost and gasping for air, go to the one person that you trust will listen non-judgmentally. Quickly tell her/him how you are feeling and ask them what they think you should be grateful for. Do not try to analyze the reason you are being negative; this will only make things worse. Focus, instead, on what you can claim as things you are grateful for and are legitimately “yours;” these are things that cannot be taken from you or lost. This will pop your head above the water and give you the ability to breathe, think and see more clearly.

In conclusion, gratefulness is the staircase for positive living. Everything you are grateful for forms a neural “root system” that is the foundation for living life to the fullest. Imagine each thing you are grateful for as a step on your staircase; even if you trip and fall, you can land in a good place. Intrinsic areas of gratitude are more powerful and stable steps than extrinsic ones. Reaching out and helping someone, who is temporarily in a negative state, return to a higher level elevates you as well. Consider carrying cards with what you are grateful for, and your mantras, around with you. Practical neuroscience is at your beck and call to create a better life and better world.

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November 28, 2012

A Practical Neuroscience Approach to Productivity

Have you noticed that most people tend to describe productivity in terms of the number of things they can accomplish in a given time period? Few give thought to whether their activities are meaningful and directed toward high-road outcomes.

Our obsessive “doing” may be our “undoing” if we don’t stop, occasionally, to examine productivity from a practical neuroscience viewpoint.  This discussion applies to small business owners and entrepreneurs as well as leaders of larger organizations.

What interferes with and disrupts personal productivity?

A frequent response is “distractions” (e.g. texts, phone calls, meetings, multitasking, interruptions, and email). I propose that “whole-brain thinking” and “continuous learning” shift the momentum toward higher productivity .and enhanced fulfillment.

“Whole-brain thinking” means using our Global and Sequential brainpower to question what we are doing, assess if it’s yielding desired outcomes and to reframe our thinking and behaviors for better results. Our Global brains explore and discover new solutions, possibilities and options; our Sequential brains use logic to analyze, make decisions and create plans. Unfortunately, most people tend to use and trust their logical brain more than their global brain; ignoring our global brains tends to get us into outdated behavior patterns that may no longer be relevant.  To grow, individually and collectively, we must tap into our imagination to reinvent the future; this is particularly true when our current pathways reap sadness and low value rewards.

Inserting continuous learning into the equation further expands the potential to elevate productivity. Continuous learning includes questioning what we believe to be true, evaluating our values and behaviors, studying best practices, and keeping current with research and technology. We also benefit from understanding how our brains are wired and what makes us tick. To advance individually and culturally, we must learn how practical neuroscience can be leveraged for a better life and world.

Are you Busy or Productive?

Three defining questions help you gain clarity on whether you’re being busy or productive. This is a “whole-brain” activity.

1. “What’s the outcome I want as a result of what I’m doing?” As an example, you may be doing email blasts and phone calls to prospects. If you can’t say why you are doing these activities, in specific and measurable terms, stop what you are doing because you may be wasting time. It’s essential you establish outcomes like “I want five new customers within six months that yield $250,000 a year of new income.” An extension of your response may be: “I enjoy doing these activities because they use my gifts, pay the bills, and my customers gain value.”
2. “Is what I am doing yielding my desired outcome?”  If you can say that your actions and behaviors are yielding your desired outcomes in measureable ways, you are being consciously productive. If your actions are not producing your desired outcomes, move on to the third question.
3. “What new actions can I take to get what I want?” Make a new list of actions that look and feel good that you haven’t implemented; consider tapping into the “best practices” of successful people doing similar things. Seek counsel and advice from your trusted advisors. Set up a metrics system to monitor how well your new actions are working.

This is whole-brain thinking. You can master this technique by asking and responding to these three questions for the actions that take up 80% or more of your work life.  The result will be higher productivity and a higher quality of life.

Practical Neuroscience Productivity Checklist

Here’s a short neuroscience checklist for becoming extraordinarily productive:

  • Have you established high-value outcomes for your work life?
  • Are your actions and behaviors yielding what you want to achieve?
  • Do you have sufficient knowledge and competencies?
  • Are your sensory and cognitive strengths aligned with what has to be accomplished?
  • Do you have systems, processes and metrics in place?
  • What should you delegate for better, lower cost & quicker results?
  • Is your work environment safe, fun and stimulating?
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November 15, 2012

Practical Neuroscience of Reversing Negativity

Turning frowns upside down

Replace negativity with positive thinking to turn frowns upside down

Have you observed and experienced an increase in negativity in the world? Politics are but one of many glaring examples of people attacking each other, expressing negativity and bringing our mood state down, as opposed to raising morale and improving the human condition.  Negative energy “rubs off” on others, and conditions get worse as negative thinking stimulates more negative thinking. This is a wake-up call to think more positively and leverage our collective brainpower for a better life and world.

If the power of your brain creates negativity and fear, think about what you can experience on the polar-opposite side by consciously using your brainpower toward different outcomes. Practical neuroscience is the only escape route I am aware of to transcend negative thinking, behaviors and outcomes.  A positive mental attitude and fresh imaginative thinking may be easier and quicker than you think. If you believe that “changing your inner thinking changes your outer world conditions” you possess a foundational truth to create greater prosperity, happiness, safety and peace of mind.

What is Negative Thinking?

Negative thinking is a low level emotional state characterized by fear, seeing scarcity, feeling bad, perceiving threat, being judgmental, blaming and attacking others, confused and scattered  thinking, and not seeing the “light at the end of the tunnel.” Negative thinking seems to occur on the sub-conscious level and arises in unexpected ways. It may be activated by current events that trigger negatively charged memories and then project fearful scenarios into the future. It may also be subtle and simple like a media or internet message that creates a domino effect in your brain. Negative thinking is “negative imagination” and serves everyone poorly; it’s a living hell, often created by fallacious information and groundless fear.

Negative emotional states are not “real;” they only seem real because of physical sensations and cascading thoughts that “things are very bad and out of control.”  Negative thoughts and feelings pick up speed and gravity when you dwell on them; a group of people sharing the same negative thoughts creates an exponential “henny penny effect.” Stock market crashes, financial crises and wars could have been averted had people been able to break free of panic caused by negative thinking.  It’s time we take conscious control of our most important asset, brainpower.

How to Reverse Negative Thinking

The key to controlling and transcending negative thinking and emotions is to recognize them for what they are; unreal with no intrinsic power. If negative thinking is the reverse of positive thinking, then start to think and act positively; this is the magic elixir.  The power used to create negative consequences is the same power available to create positive and pleasant outcomes; it’s two sides of the same coin. You don’t have to rely on a toss; you have the power to choose which side of the coin will define your life.

Positive thinking is characterized by seeing an abundant world with infinite resources, optimism, feeling safe, strong self-esteem, being happy, cooperating and collaborating, and trusting your brain to create solutions to challenges.  “Positive imagination” has the reverse effect of “negative imagination;” think about what your world would be like if you and others practice positive thinking 51%, or more, of your thinking time.

Positive thinking brings the best out in everyone willing to participate. For people deeply entrenched in negative thinking patterns, the process of “thought reversal” still works if they practice the adage of “fake it until you make it.” Forcing a smile on your face, a healthy laugh and repeating affirmations like “it’s not as bad as it looks and feels,” “there is a way out of this mess” and “cooperating with others will change this situation” get’s the attention of the higher and positive thinking  parts of your brain.

The most important part of reversing negative thinking is  stating the positive outcomes you want; saying and thinking what you don’t want always makes things worse because what you give attention to, gets stronger.  Writing, envisioning and saying aloud what you want will kick-start your higher cognitive brain functions until positive thinking becomes automatic.

In closing, the power of positive thinking increases exponentially when you connect and align with people of like mind. This fun, powerful and simple process creates solutions and new realities that do no harm to you or others; the maximal state is helping others improve their quality of life, as you improve yours. This builds good will and magnetizes more people to join you, increasing the benefits for all exponentially.

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November 9, 2012

Practical Neuroscience of Inclusivity

Inclusivity may seem like a philosophical or academic term; it may even “feel good” and be worthy of attention. Practically speaking, inclusivity, or the creation of “common ground” for people to interact peacefully and cooperatively to achieve something of value, is elusive and lacking. Practical neuroscience provides the understanding and tools to experience inclusivity in positive and proactive ways.

Principles of Inclusivity

  • People engage and do things for their reasons, not yours.
  • Differences tend to fragment and separate; similarities tend to bond and unite.
  • People seem to focus more on differences than on similarities; this can be reversed.
  • The quality and quantity of similarities defines common ground for inclusivity.
  • The size and stability of the “common ground” is the driving and cohesive force for cooperation, collaboration and success.
  • Common ground becomes the focal point; differences are respected and put into “neutral gear.”

Establishing “common ground” is the basis of long-term friendships, harmonious spousal relationships, successful families and sustainable organizations of all sizes. Another way to look at common ground (inclusivity) is by mapping out the “crossing trails” of each party’s common needs, values, interests, experiences and beliefs.

The following questions help people enter into inclusive relationships; the methodology is expandable to organizations and potentially bridges gaps between political ideologies and competitive factions. The caveat is that all parties must be willing to engage in the process of defining their similarities and differences. The key to successful, inclusive relationships is to establish enough common matches that align with and cross over one another.

Three Questions Define Inclusivity

1. What shared outcomes do we want to experience together?

The response to this question is the bedrock foundation for inclusive, sustainable and positive relationships. Unless there are common outcomes, how can two or more people stay in a relationship to achieve something of value together? Examples in a personal relationship may be long-term friendships characterized by fun, trust, respect and growth; business outcomes may be satisfying customer and employee needs with profitability goals; government outcomes may be employment, educational and wellness opportunities for everyone. Beware that some outcomes may be repulsive; this should not be a roadblock to engaging in the outcomes that you do align with. “Shared outcomes” are the focal points; differing outcomes are ignored and judgment is withheld. Differences most often derail good intentions and noble causes.

2. What are our common values?

Values define behaviors; they are how we treat one another and forge rapport, trust and respect. The group must agree to practice one or more shared values; ideally, they are values aligned and congruent with “high road” behaviors.  As an example, if a leadership team values “people,” they treat them with kindness and try to create safe and stimulating environments; non-congruent behavior would include fear tactics and firing people when economic conditions seem to be worsening. Values are “how” we go about doing things together; outcomes are the “what.”

3. What interests, passions and experiences can we share with one another?

This can include our children, hobbies, self-improvement projects, people we admire, books, interesting places visited and life lessons. These subjects provide variety, texture and depth to our relationships as we work together on shared outcomes; this bonds us at the human and spiritual levels. Sharing with each other on this level provides for friendships, growth and continuous learning.

In summary, inclusivity is a simple and powerful way to bring people together to accomplish valuable and fulfilling things together. It’s essential that you agree on the “what” and “how;” focus on your similarities rather than your differences. As you earn trust and respect, even your differences can be leveraged to achieve a higher quality of life for everyone.

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November 7, 2012

Neuroleadership Checklist

Do you think of yourself as a neuroleader? Perhaps you are one and don’t know it.  If you acknowledge, respect and leverage people’s uniqueness, and believe “changing your thinking changes your world,” you are already using high road practices, which are soundly based in neuroscience.

Neuroleadership yields better and more sustainable results than traditional leadership models, which are often characterized by such destructive behaviors as creating stress-filled workplaces, demanding that people work harder and faster, treating people like they are stupid and lazy, gaining objectives at the expense of others, and believing competition is essential for survival. This faulty and defective thinking eventually deteriorates any organization, causing it to implode.

 

How to Use the Checklist

  • Benchmark your level of positive “high road behaviors”
  • Measure improvement toward being a Master Level Neuroleader
  • On a scale of 1 to 5, with 5 being the highest level, rate your thinking and behaviors
  • Receive feedback from peers and direct reports as a “reality check”

Checklist for Neuroleadership

  1. I consciously try to be the best I can be without causing harm to others.
  2. I consciously help others to be the best they can be.
  3. I respect people’s differences, gifts and interests.
  4. I know my people’s sensory and cognitive strengths.
  5. I align work activities with the strengths and interests of my people.
  6. I make big decisions using diverse points of view.
  7. I use positive and affirming language that elevates people’s mood state.
  8. I show empathy for people’s problems; they know I care.
  9. I seek to understand before being understood.
  10. I suspend judgment until I understand differing points of view.
  11. I don’t always have to be “right.”
  12. I practice “high road” behaviors that bring out the best in others.
  13. I feel inspired about my personal and/or organization’s vision, goals and values.
  14. I create safe and stimulating work environments.
  15. I support cooperation and collaboration instead of competition.
  16. I treat everyone consistently; people know what to expect from me.
  17. I have fun at work and encourage others to do the same.
  18. I celebrate the success of others.
  19. I teach and coach others what I am learning about neuroleadership.
  20. I encourage others to do the same.

Score Interpretation:

90 – 100: Master Level Neuroleader

80 – 90:   High Road Neuroleader

70 – 80:   Foundational Neuroleader

60 – 70:   Neophyte Neuroleader

50 – 60:  Traditional Leader with Potential to Improve

20 – 50:  Antiquated Leader with Potential to Change

Neuroleadership, on the most foundational level, is becoming the “captain of your life,” to improve the quality of your life without harming others. Regardless of whether you interact with a handful of people, or supervise and lead a team, you can embrace high road behaviors that create “win-win” situations for everyone.

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October 2, 2012

Activate Your Pleasure-Memory Connection to Overcome Obstacles

memory Road

memory Road (Photo credit: Peter Lee(이원희))

Do you experience internal resistance to engagement with certain activities, and find yourself pushing back or procrastinating? Examples include dealing with relationship conflict, finding a new job, saving money, starting an exercise program, public speaking, organizing a closet, or enrolling in a self-improvement course. Why do you push back on some things, but others come easily and naturally? Practical neuroscience provides understanding and solutions that help overcome resistance to accomplishing important things in your life.

 

The Pleasure-Memory Connection

Dr. Arych Routhenber, neuroscientist from Northwestern University, says that the brain reward pathways play an important role in learning and memory. He was one of the first to discover that the pathways that generate pleasure-producing endorphins are also the same centers for locking in memory. Most people verify that they most easily remember and recall events and situations where they experienced strong, positive emotions.

The greater the pleasure and reward, the stronger the memories are likely to be.  Positive and pleasant memories are created when solving problems successfully, overcoming challenges, enjoying a wonderful meal, maybe experiencing your first kiss, learning something new, or making satisfying changes in your life.  The pleasure reward mechanism can also be activated by environmental elements like an inspiring nature scene, art, or music, present while you are doing or experiencing something.  Extrinsic rewards like money, acknowledgment, kind words, seeing smiling faces, receiving a pat on the back, or hearing a of round of applause all activate your pleasure-memory mechanism.  The type and source of the reward is not important, only that the pleasure is registered and valued in your brain.

Overcoming Obstacles

All people have things they don’t want to do, prompting them to push back. It’s likely that you have negative emotions associated with what you don’t want to do. These emotions may be real and should be honored; or, perhaps, they are imaginary and stem from false programming and mistaken experiences. The natures of the feelings associated with your thoughts drive your willingness or resistance to doing certain things. The following practical neuroscience steps help you gain clarity on your thoughts and feelings, make intelligent decisions, and remove obstacles for positive life changes.

1.      Establish value and desired outcomes.

It’s best to first establish the value and desired outcomes to build the foundation for motivation, action, and new positive behaviors. Why would you engage in changing a mindset or commencing on new life pathways unless there were redeeming rewards, intrinsic and/or extrinsic? This first step is essential to making a conscious decision if you really want to expend time and energy to change your life. It may be that the subject you are resisting has adverse consequences and low value; if this is the case, you can get this subject off your plate in a guilt-free manner.  Conversely, the outcomes may be highly advantageous; then, the remaining step is to remove the obstacles. These defining questions guide you through the process of establishing value:

  • In what ways will the outcomes benefit my quality-of-life?
  • Are the outcomes short-lived or long-term?
  • Do other people benefit?
  • Will I be happy with the outcomes in five years?

2.       Activate your pleasure-memory connection before taking outward action.

World-class athletes and coaches know that practicing in their “mind’s-eye” yields equal or better results than actually “doing it” physically. The brain can’t tell the difference between what it perceives internally and what is perceived externally. Neuroscientists have conducted brain scans of people imagining moving their finger  and compared them with those of people actually doing it; the same region of the brain “lights up” each time.

Doesn’t it make sense that you can use the principle above to activate your pleasure-memory connection before having to move into “outer world” action? It’s like a free trial run or a free taste test that doesn’t require a full commitment. Assuming you’ve decided to remove an obstacle or resistance to something, you have a seemingly magical and safe way to kick-start this natural, practical neuroscience process that gets you rolling forward in the right direction.

You might want to start the process by studying and observing others doing what you want to accomplish; resources include people you know, TV, videos, movies, books, magazines and internet resources. This research gives you ideas, best practices and models-of-excellence to replicate in your mental practice sessions. Get into a quiet, safe and comfortable environment. Close your eyes. See and feel yourself doing the activities with ease and in total flow; imagine having fun. Play some background classical music that calms negative emotions and stimulates your imagination. It’s likely you will automatically start doing the activities naturally in your “outer life” after a couple of “inner world” practice sessions. This process can be applied to virtually anything in your life.

In conclusion, practical neuroscience principles and practices help you overcome obstacles and resistance to making positive changes in your life, allowing joyful engagement in personal improvement programs. The key steps are to decide on the redeeming, long-term value of changing your old and outdated patterns of behavior, followed by practicing new and improved behaviors in your imagination to activate your pleasure-memory connection. This process gives you more of what you really want to improve your quality-of-life.

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