Posts tagged ‘relationships’

« Older Entries  |  
November 9, 2012

Practical Neuroscience of Inclusivity

Inclusivity may seem like a philosophical or academic term; it may even “feel good” and be worthy of attention. Practically speaking, inclusivity, or the creation of “common ground” for people to interact peacefully and cooperatively to achieve something of value, is elusive and lacking. Practical neuroscience provides the understanding and tools to experience inclusivity in positive and proactive ways.

Principles of Inclusivity

  • People engage and do things for their reasons, not yours.
  • Differences tend to fragment and separate; similarities tend to bond and unite.
  • People seem to focus more on differences than on similarities; this can be reversed.
  • The quality and quantity of similarities defines common ground for inclusivity.
  • The size and stability of the “common ground” is the driving and cohesive force for cooperation, collaboration and success.
  • Common ground becomes the focal point; differences are respected and put into “neutral gear.”

Establishing “common ground” is the basis of long-term friendships, harmonious spousal relationships, successful families and sustainable organizations of all sizes. Another way to look at common ground (inclusivity) is by mapping out the “crossing trails” of each party’s common needs, values, interests, experiences and beliefs.

The following questions help people enter into inclusive relationships; the methodology is expandable to organizations and potentially bridges gaps between political ideologies and competitive factions. The caveat is that all parties must be willing to engage in the process of defining their similarities and differences. The key to successful, inclusive relationships is to establish enough common matches that align with and cross over one another.

Three Questions Define Inclusivity

1. What shared outcomes do we want to experience together?

The response to this question is the bedrock foundation for inclusive, sustainable and positive relationships. Unless there are common outcomes, how can two or more people stay in a relationship to achieve something of value together? Examples in a personal relationship may be long-term friendships characterized by fun, trust, respect and growth; business outcomes may be satisfying customer and employee needs with profitability goals; government outcomes may be employment, educational and wellness opportunities for everyone. Beware that some outcomes may be repulsive; this should not be a roadblock to engaging in the outcomes that you do align with. “Shared outcomes” are the focal points; differing outcomes are ignored and judgment is withheld. Differences most often derail good intentions and noble causes.

2. What are our common values?

Values define behaviors; they are how we treat one another and forge rapport, trust and respect. The group must agree to practice one or more shared values; ideally, they are values aligned and congruent with “high road” behaviors.  As an example, if a leadership team values “people,” they treat them with kindness and try to create safe and stimulating environments; non-congruent behavior would include fear tactics and firing people when economic conditions seem to be worsening. Values are “how” we go about doing things together; outcomes are the “what.”

3. What interests, passions and experiences can we share with one another?

This can include our children, hobbies, self-improvement projects, people we admire, books, interesting places visited and life lessons. These subjects provide variety, texture and depth to our relationships as we work together on shared outcomes; this bonds us at the human and spiritual levels. Sharing with each other on this level provides for friendships, growth and continuous learning.

In summary, inclusivity is a simple and powerful way to bring people together to accomplish valuable and fulfilling things together. It’s essential that you agree on the “what” and “how;” focus on your similarities rather than your differences. As you earn trust and respect, even your differences can be leveraged to achieve a higher quality of life for everyone.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a Comment »

Tags: , , , , , ,
May 30, 2012

Shield of Values Restores Family Harmony

Family coat of arms

Family coat of arms (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Two marriages with a combination of five children and six grandchildren have been an experiential learning classroom for family living. Looking back at lessons learned, some very painful, combined with working in the field of practical neuroscience has motivated Deanna and me to share some simple and dynamic ways to improve family life. These practical neuroscience principles and practices will leapfrog family respect, communication and harmony. You may find some gems here if you are experiencing pain and chaos in your family of two or twenty.

Please consider the idea that every family member is doing the very best they can.  This applies to you, your spouse, your children, grandchildren and your parents. Accepting this idea may be difficult due to social programming, emotional reactions and the ego’s need to be “right.”  Practical neuroscience explains and supports this potentially controversial statement. Doing and being the very best you can is influenced in the moment by state-of-mind, complex human dynamics, personal demands, worries, health issues, stress, self-awareness, programming and having the proper tools to deal with each emerging situation.

Patterns of behavior have positive and negative effects on all family members. They are often subtle and can build slowly. Most people are unaware of destructive patterns until things “boil over.” If they are aware, they have inadequate tools to deal with them on a positive and proactive basis. So, on a moment-to-moment basis, everyone is truly doing and being the best they can be. No one is at fault, yet most people seem to think they are right and everyone else is wrong. This builds resentment, initiating attack and defense that serves no useful purpose. Hopefully, this provides some helpful insight into why it’s essential to be more compassionate for yourself and others.

A simple thought of practical merit, accepted by most people, is that everyone can improve and be a better person. Examples include being kinder, more compassionate, a better listener, available to help others, and becoming a role model for higher-road behaviors. The truth that we are all capable of doing and being better is the genesis for human development and improving family harmony.

Create your family shield of values

Everyone has values because values drive behavior and behaviors create your inner and outer experiences. Values have different grades or levels ranging from “low road” to “high road.” Behind each “high road value” is a “high road behavior.” Most people think they know something about values, but few really go beyond the surface level. Creating your family shield of values is a safe, fun and dynamic way to improve all aspects of family life.

Step 1: Setting the stage

Bring your family members together for an hour when distractions and emotional turmoil are minimal. Select an environment that is fun, safe, comfortable and inviting. Gently and compassionately, inquire if everyone is interested and committed to improving family life. Acknowledge that everyone is doing the best they can. Ask for agreement that everyone can be a better person and family life can improve if everyone makes small and consistent positive contributions each and every day. Have plenty of paper and colored markers or pens available. A flip chart is ideal for all family members to see their ideas acknowledged.

Step 2: Establishing the shield

Google the phrase “check list for personal values.” Select and print out copies of the resources that appeal to you. Each family member decides on two of their personal favorite and “highest values.” The values are recorded for all to see. The next step is for each person to think about and write down two to three associated behaviors for each of their personal values. As an example, if “fun” is a value, then possible behaviors are “more play time, lightheartedness, less judgment, sense of humor and being your natural and authentic self.” The behaviors should be recorded, positively acknowledged and discussed by all family members.

Step 3: Making and keeping the family promise

Consider creating your shield from internet graphic images that you can customize with your family names, values and behaviors. Have one or more family members with visual and graphic skills take on this task. Each family member can read aloud his or her chosen values and the behaviors they will practice. Applause before and after each person shares their promise is an affirming, “team building” practice.

Once your family’s shield of values has been created, post a copy in a common area like the kitchen, where all family members can see it as they go about their day-to-day business. This daily reminder reinforces practice of positive behaviors and encourages impromptu discussions about family values.

A great weekly or bi-weekly family ritual is coming together to acknowledge and compliment each other on the positive behaviors experienced from each person. Do this, even if there are only two of you.  “High fives” are usually appreciated. The ritual serves everyone and becomes a wonderful legacy to share with others and pass on to future generations.

In conclusion, self-forgiveness and forgiveness of others is the pathway to healing, harmony and human development.  Blame, attack and defense do no good for anyone. These behaviors deteriorate self-esteem and family relationships. Building your family shield of values is the pathway to making positive behaviors more conscious and deliberate and reversing destructive patterns of behavior.

Posted in Family | Leave a Comment »

Tags: , , , , , , ,
November 16, 2011

Three Reasons Why People Talk More and Listen Less

Listen, Understand, Act

Image by highersights via Flickr

Have you noticed that many people can’t remember what was said, interrupt others regularly, rarely ask genuine questions and generally have poor listening skills? Has attentive and respectful listening gone out of style since the advent of TV, computer technology, cell phones, texting and video games? I wonder if people were more “auditory,” from a listening standpoint, when distractions were fewer, people engaged in more mealtime conversations and radio was a bigger source of news and entertainment.

Our worldwide statistics show that 78% of the population least prefers to listen as a primary way to receive sensory information; these people prefer to take in information visually and kinesthetically. Why do people who least prefer to listen select talking as their preferred way to express themselves? Practical neuroscience and common sense reveal possible reasons and provide pathways to improve listening competencies.

Reasons Why People Talk More and Listen Less

  • Lack of awareness: I believe most people are unaware of how their poor listening skills negatively impact rapport, harmony and understanding others. Interrupting, “tuning out” others and raising one’s voice to get attention serve no useful purpose; hurt feelings often occur and important information is lost. As a practical matter, meager listening takes a steep toll on valuable time that could be used for other things. At worst, important relationships can be put in jeopardy and may crash. These factors are why people benefit from being informed of how their brains are wired to receive and process information. Practical neuroscience reveals our sensory and cognitive processing strengths, thus providing a simple recipe to communicate with others in optimal ways.
  • Busy Schedules: During an executive coaching session, I asked a person about his listening competency. His reply was, “it’s poor and I don’t care because I don’t have time to listen.” He went on to say, “I prefer to receive information by email, text and brief discussions when walking with a colleague to a meeting or during mealtime.” I asked him what impact his tactics would have on his morale and productivity if he walked in the shoes of his direct reports and peers.  He then asked how he could be a better listener; the Hot Tips (below) summarize what I suggested. Within a week of using these new “high road” listening tactics, this busy executive received positive feedback from three people saying they enjoyed working with him and it seemed like he was different person.
  • Maintaining Control: As long as you are talking, you don’t have to listen, answer questions or respond to other people. A higher form of talking is using language understandable to others, stating the purpose of the communication and asking questions to confirm their understanding. Listening requires attention, focus, personal involvement and feedback. Attentive and respectful listening sends a strong message that you care about the other person; talking, alone, may introduce an element of doubt about your intention and integrity.

Hot Tips for Being a Better Listener

  • Ask for the purpose and desired outcomes of the conversation.
  • Respectfully, set a time period for the discussion, if time is an issue.
  • Do not interrupt and impose your opinion.
  • Ask questions to gain clarity and understanding.
  • Listen for congruency of tone-of-voice and body language with what’s being said.
  • Paraphrase what you hear.

In conclusion, improved listening skills pay big dividends of relationship rapport, mutual respect, understanding others and making effective use of available time. Based on statistics, most people should talk less and communicate more visually and kinesthetically. Practical neuroscience methods are the ideal solution for “transmitting” information on the preferred “receiving wavelengths” of others.

Related articles

Posted in Career, Education, Family, Personal | 5 Comments »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
September 28, 2011

Recovering From a Crashed Relationship

Broken Heart symbol

Image via Wikipedia

When a relationship with a loved one or someone you work with crashes, the effect takes a big toll on your mental, emotional and physical health. How many of these symptoms can you relate to? What others can you add to the list?

  • Thinking about the situation and playing it back in your mind more than 3 times a day
  • Avoiding contact or feeling apprehensive about the person
  • Finding yourself attacking and/or defending, rather than searching for a solution
  • Having difficulty focusing on your work and other relationships
  • Sleeping less and fitfully
  • Building your case that you are “right” and the other person is “wrong” or “off-base”
  • Experiencing lower productivity and getting fewer things done
  • Feeling a sore throat or cold coming on, new aches and pains

Are you so immersed and drowning in your thoughts and feelings, that you haven’t considered asking some questions that may lead you back to a better state of mind and being?

1. Do you want to heal and improve the relationship? If not, why?

2. What positive outcomes will occur when your relationship gets better?

3. Does the other person want the same or different things?

4. Did the collapse occur over time or instantaneously, without advance notice?

5. What are your insights on the factors that contributed to the collapse?

6. Are you willing to open up and share your thoughts and feelings?

7. How well do you both normally communicate with one another? Does it seem you are on the same or different wavelengths?

Many couples and people who work together are simply not on the same “wavelength” when communicating and processing information. They also are likely to have very different strengths regarding work, personal activities and how they go about solving problems and making decisions. These differences, if you are unaware of them, will inevitably cause conflict and frustration. Being aware of your differences is the foundation for an extraordinary relationship because you cover a wide range of diversity and experience you can tap into and leverage.

Here is a solid and safe approach to repairing the damage in a crashed relationship. Agree to a time and safe place when “cool heads” prevail. Share the discussion questions above in advance. Take each question, one at a time, and allow each other to express without interruptions, judgements or questions. Ask questions after each person completes expressing their thoughts and feelings. Acknowledge each person’s thoughts and feelings by paraphrasing what you heard, observed and felt. Consider learning how you both prefer to exchange and process information if you decide to build a new and better relationship. The author resource provides a helpful website to expand and deepen appreciation and respect for one another.

Posted in Personal | 1 Comment »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,
September 1, 2011

Can Practical Neuroscience Methods Help Adults with ADHD?

High Dopamine Transporter Levels Not Correlate...

Image via Wikipedia

A recent St. Louis public TV special on Adult ADHD stimulated my thinking about this rapidly growing phenomenon. My first reaction was that I possess several characteristics of ADHD and wonder what an accurate diagnosis would reveal. I then thought about people I work with who have one or more ADHD symptoms and are competent, accomplished and self-fulfilled individuals with successful careers and harmonious personal relationships. I have used practical neuroscience strategies for over two decades to learn and perform in areas I never thought possible. These thoughts gave me hope that self-help is possible for tens of millions of people suffering from this condition.

My questions are:

  • Can adults diagnosed with ADHD help themselves manage specific negative traits?
  • Is the rate of adult ADHD growing and getting worse, or are increased awareness of the problem and improved diagnosis methods, finally revealing a human condition that has been around for a very long time?
  • What effect does physical environment, the economy and world affairs have on this condition?
  • What, besides prescription drugs and psychotherapy, may help people with mild and severe symptoms?

The following is a short list of Adult ADHD symptoms and traits, which may become more manageable using practical neuroscience self-help methods. Severe behavioral symptoms that typically require a combination of prescription drugs and psychotherapy are not addressed here. The list is organized by the three commonly used ADHD categories. Following each trait is a summary of how self-awareness of sensory and cognitive thinking strengths and “blind spots” may provide some level of relief and increased performance.

Hyperactivity

1. Impulsive movement, fidgeting and touching things

A high percentage of the population is comprised of Kinesthetic learners. Their world revolves around physical movement, hands-on activities and how things feel. When Kinesthetic preferences are significantly stronger and more dominant than Visual and Auditory preferences, the Kinesthetic traits associated with ADHD become more observable and may appear extreme. This imbalance can be managed by strengthening the next strongest sensory pathway, Visual or Auditory. Jobs, household activities, hobbies and sports activities, requiring extensive use of Kinesthetic skill sets, are healthy and productive outlets for highly Kinesthetic individuals.

Impulsivity

2. Interrupting others

Most people are poor listeners and do not realize how little meaning they extract from what is said. Very few are able to detect underlying feelings and intention by listening to tone-of-voice. Talking over other people and interrupting is frequently an unconscious act of people with low Auditory preferences and can undermine relationships. When individuals know their Auditory acuity is low, they can improve communication effectiveness in conversations by merely being more aware that they are poor listeners. This shift in awareness actually improves their listening ability through focus on their “non-preference.” Paraphrasing what they heard, making comfortable eye contact and asking questions to gain clarity strengthen listening ability, while improving relationship harmony. Everyone can gain from these practical neuroscience communication methods.

3. Switching tasks rapidly

Some people’s brains are wired to think Globally, in terms of the “big picture.” They live in a world of possibilities and options and are comfortable with open-ended situations. They naturally tend to jump around from task to task, giving casual observers the impression that they are accomplishing very little. Global thinking people have much to offer the world, however, when it comes to identifying future solutions and outcomes for current situations in need of change. Individuals with this cognitive preference should align themselves with Global activities to make use of their strengths. Global thinkers should also consider seeking help with life’s practical matters from Sequential-thinking, trusted advisors.

Inattention

4. Time management and organization

Issues with time management and organization may share the same core cause as rapid task switching. Time management and organizations skills can be learned under most circumstances. This is where Sequential-thinking family members and co-workers can  role model and coach Sequential skills.

5. Work related mistakes and accidents

Every person has “blind spots” related to their least preferred sensory and cognitive pathways.  Decreased attention to these pathways means increased likelihood of mistakes and accidents. Examples include:

  • Low Auditory – may not hear something important
  • Low Visual  – may miss seeing something important
  • Low Kinesthetic  – may be physically awkward and clumsy
  • Low Sequential – may not follow logical steps or safe protocols
  • Low Global – may miss identifying possibilities and options when logic fails

Awareness of “blind spots” allows for increased focus, when the risk of a mistake or accident is highest.

It’s also advisable to have trusted friends “cover your blind spots” with their strengths.

6. Taking longer to complete tasks than others

This condition is common to all people, as a function of their sensory and cognitive thinking strengths and “blind spots.” You tend to get more, productive work done, when using your strongest and most preferred pathways. What most people do not know is that they can boost personal productivity by creating a physical environment conducive to doing specific tasks and activities. Examples:

  • Auditory tasks – quiet and interruption free environment
  • Visual tasks – organized, attractive, uncluttered environment
  • Kinesthetic tasks – comfortable environment that allows movement
  • Sequential tasks – formal environment
  • Global tasks – informal environment

Performing tasks in compatible environments often boosts productivity by 20% -60%.

7. Relationship conflicts

Nearly everyone has difficulty communicating with some of the people in their life. This is when his or her “transmitting style” is out-of-sync with another person’s “receiving style.” Some combinations of sensory sequence and cognitive processing style place a person at high risk to be out of alignment with a large percentage of the people they interact with at home and work. Knowing the communication preferences of others, allows adjustment of one’s “transmitting style” to their “receiving styles,” thus enhancing rapport and understanding.

In conclusion, you have nothing to lose by learning how your brain is wired to receive and process sensory information and by knowing your “blind spots.” These insights may be what you need to know to manage your ADHD symptoms, regardless of your diagnosis. You may be delighted and surprised by how much you can improve and achieve with self-administered and safe practical neuroscience knowledge and tools. Look online for trusted sources of statistically validated practical neuroscience assessment products like Brain PathWays™ to help you and your loved ones relieve Adult ADHD symptoms.

Related articles

Posted in Family, Personal, Uncategorized | 9 Comments »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
August 2, 2011

Regaining Your Personal Power Through Neuroscience and Love

A firm hand on the tiller

Image by Ruth Flickr via Flickr

Are you feeling lost and powerless? Perhaps you’re wondering how you got to where you are and what you need to do to get to a better place. Many people are experiencing confusion, fear and uncertainty during these troubled times. Regaining your personal power is your navigation system to a better life. Personal power is a combination of brainpower, “heart power” and a sprinkling of “ego power.”

What is Personal Power?

Personal power is when you experience what you want regardless of what’s going on around you. People with personal power consciously and deliberately use practical neuroscience to manifest the most important things they need for fulfillment and growth. The highest level of personal power is when you add “heart power,” or love, to brainpower.

Personal power is also being self-aware of your mental, emotional and physical nature and continuously improving each on a daily basis. Through continuous learning and positive actions, your state of mind and body improves; likewise, your knowledge and “tool box” of manifestation methods grows as well. This process strengthens and increases your personal power.

Great leaders use personal power and the power of like minds to create positive and sustainable change. They know we live in an infinite and abundant universe capable of creating what we want through thoughts, words and actions. Great leaders are resolute and confident when changing things for highest good. In the words of Winston Churchill, “never, ever give up.”

Brainpower

The underlying neuroscience concept for using brainpower to manifest change is to define and get very clear on what you want, rather than what you don’t. Your brain attracts and creates experiences it imagines and thinks about.

Make your goals real by writing them down, imagining wonderful outcomes and thinking about the positive feelings associated with what you want. It’s essential to develop and keep a positive mental attitude and it helps to make and work a plan.

Heart Power

True personal power does no harm to anyone. Love knows that everyone is doing the best they can. Judgment enters the picture because we are all capable of doing better and improving. This statement may help you understand why people attack themselves and others. Everything is relative like “hot and cold,” “good and bad;” it all depends on your perspective, based on your life experience.

Love places you in “neutral gear,” where you quietly and calmly observe and evaluate what’s going on. The goal is understanding the dynamics and potential outcomes. Avoid getting caught up in an emotional state that blocks clear thinking. You can take action if you wish; just do no harm to anyone. Attacks and judgment fuel volatile situations like injecting oxygen into a blast furnace. Forgiveness, love and non-judgment heal.

Ego Power

Ego power is about “me, me, wonderful me.” At extreme levels, narcissistic egotistical behavior dominates without regard for others. It’s highly unlikely that anyone reading this article falls into this category because these extremists have no interest in brainpower and love power. Using a combination of neuroscience, brainpower and love, automatically puts the ego in check. So, a sprinkling of ego makes your journey interesting and fun. Your ego is a part of you and deserves respect and love.

Summary

True personal power is in trusting that your brain, heart and the natural order of the universe are working in your favor. A gentle and firm hand on the “tiller” will keep you on-course while you remain alert to changing conditions, opportunities and risks.

Related articles

Posted in Personal, Uncategorized | 10 Comments »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
July 5, 2011

Three Secret Hot Tips for Exceptional Rapport and Communication

Communication

Image by P Shanks via Flickr

Nearly everyone desires exceptional rapport and communications with people they love and care about; this is the key to building successful and healthy long-term relationships. Professional relationships also require communication excellence to convey information efficiently and gain understanding quickly for people to do their jobs properly.

The core premise for exceptional rapport and communication is anchored in practical neuroscience. Achieving communications excellence requires attentiveness to everyone’s unique preferences for taking in and processing information. When you align your transmitting style with another’s preferred receiving style, you exponentially increase the probability for greater rapport and understanding. This is because people immediately become aware that you are on “their wavelength.” It is also important to respect the other person’s views, values and where they are coming from. These principles have enormous implications in all human relationships.

Hot Tip #1: Seek to understand before being understood

People relate to one another better when there is mutual respect and some level of caring about each other’s well being. In work situations, be sure to take the time to build sound relationship foundations, even if there are areas of disagreement and conflict. These foundations are particularly useful when time is of the essence to get things accomplished in stressful situations.

Interrupting one another to drive-home points-of-view, before paying attention and understanding each other, is a “dead end street.” Interruptions usually result in confusion, anger and resentment. It’s not necessary to agree with one another. Understanding respective positions, rationale and thinking, however, are required to co-exist peacefully. One can always find areas of commonality to move forward, no matter how far apart you may seem.

Hot Tip #2: Align with the person’s sensory and cognitive thinking preferences

Auditory learners prefer to listen and ask questions. Be sure to ask them to paraphrase their understanding of what you said; likewise, repeat back to them what you heard them say. They need quiet and interruption free environments to listen deeply and process what was heard.

Visual learners prefer to see instructions, progress reports and general information in visual form with a minimum of words. Use email, mind maps and white boards to convey key points. They prefer uncluttered environment to avoid distraction from what they are looking at.

Kinesthetic learners prefer hands-on interactions, when receiving and processing information. They need to incorporate movement and touch, when looking at or hearing about the subject matter. Provide for physical comfort, movement and frequent breaks.

Sequential thinkers prefer information presented in orderly, logical and realistic ways. They want facts, figures and data from reliable sources. Sequential thinkers prefer bright light and a formal work environment.

Global thinkers prefer the “big picture,” possibilities and options. They thrive in open-ended situations where they can use their imagination. Global thinkers prefer informal and unstructured environments.

Hot Tip #3:Match, Match, Match

Rapport language means specific types of words, which resonate with Auditory, Visual and Kinesthetic learners and Sequential and Global thinkers. Use the appropriate rapport language to match the preferences of others. To learn more about this, contact the author for a free, one-page Rapport Language List. The email link is on the Brain PathWays™ web site.

Vocal speed varies, depending on the person’s strongest sensory pathway. Pay attention to the other person’s vocal speed and match it respectfully, so they experience language alignment with you.

Body Language reveals what the person is experiencing and feeling. Imagine yourself as their dance partner. Be respectful and match subtly with similar, but not exact, movements. Make comfortable eye contact when eyes meet. Staring may make a person feel uncomfortable, whereas no eye contact may send the message that you are not interested.

In summary, secret hot tips for exceptional rapport and communication are simple and quick practical neuroscience methods that connect you with another person on deep and meaningful levels. These practices are based on conscious and respectful transmission of your message, in the way that the other person’s brain is wired to receive and process information most effectively. All personal and professional relationships you care about will benefit from these brain-based hot tips. The outcomes are always greater understanding, increased respect and enhanced ability to solve problems and move forward together.

Related articles

Posted in Career, Family, Personal | 10 Comments »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
June 1, 2011

Quantum Mechanics and The Golden Rule

The Parable of the Good Samaritan. Other relig...

Image via Wikipedia

Have you been intrigued by the Golden Rule stating that you should treat others, as you want to be treated? This simple yet profoundly powerful statement has served people of diverse cultures and ideologies for thousands of years. It has been revered and endorsed by all the world’s great religions. It must have elements of universal truth and goodness to have withstood advances in human development, practical neuroscience, technology, education, philosophy and modern psychology. With our global population at 7 billion people, we urgently need broader and deeper application of universal truths that serve all humanity. There may be no better truth and transformative power than the Golden Rule.

Shifting the context of the Golden Rule around its central axis reveals another aspect of its universal truth and power. This thinking was sparked by the author’s spiritual journey with his accompanying life path work in practical neuroscience. The intention behind this article is to expand use of the original Golden Rule and for more people to role-model and teach others its awesome and divine power.

I believe the Golden Rule can be re-contextualized as, “The way we treat others, we receive the same treatment.” When we treat others in loving, compassionate, empathetic, helpful and caring ways, we receive the gift ourselves. This occurs even when the intended “receiver” does not acknowledge the gift and we cannot sense any changes. When we dispense hurtful and wounding thoughts, words and actions, we receive the effect, as well. In fact, the giver is the first to receive what is transmitted because they are the originator of the thought. The bottom-line is that giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin.

What we give (e.g. from the spectrum of love to fear) is received by the giver first. This may be difficult to understand. On an experiential level, think about a time you thought loving and kind thoughts about someone or a situation. What did you experience, feel and receive while you were thinking or dispensing your thoughts, words or actions? How could you possibly experience anything other than positive and loving feeling? Now recall a time you had hateful, negative thoughts and, perhaps, said things you now regret. Did you experience the feeling you were transmitting?

It may be helpful to look at the connectivity of this “giving and receiving” principle through the lens of quantum mechanics. Simply stated, everything in the universe is connected in some way. The “observer effect” says that observing something changes that which is observed in some manner. Thinking, tapping into your memory and emotions, using imagination, constructing and saying words silently or aloud, and planning actions are all powerful and irreversible “energies” in the quantum world.

A popular and well documented illustration of the quantum mechanics of thoughts, words and visual imagery is the book, The Hidden Messages in Water by Masaru Emoto. The photographs show how the crystalline structure of water is transformed into beautiful and spectacular images by prayer, loving words and positive images. This effect occurs with the most polluted and toxic water imaginable. Conversely, clean water is transformed into dark, frightening crystalline structures with negative imagery, thoughts and words.

If thoughts, words and visual images change the crystalline structure of water, think about the effects on the human brain and body, constituted of 55% to 78% water, depending on body weight. Dr. Emoto’s stunning contribution helps us understand and appreciate the importance of The Golden Rule through the lens of quantum mechanics.

In conclusion, The Golden Rule may be the most important and powerful truth available to change the quality of our lives and the world in which we live. When people of like minds think and act-out the same thoughts, the transmitted power may be exponential. The “transmitter” is always the first to receive what is given, regardless of quality, intention and content. Good and positive thoughts create good and positive effects. Conversely, negative thoughts have negative effects. The choice is ours.

Posted in Personal, Uncategorized | 2 Comments »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
May 6, 2011

Who Can You Trust in These Troubled Times?

Trust

Image by m-c via Flickr

Who is the most trustworthy person you know? If you name someone other than yourself, this article will give you priceless insights and information to move your life forward at lightning speed. If you can’t trust yourself, how can you trust others? Learn the reasons why you can trust your brain, the knowledge it holds and its amazing problem solving ability. Then, learn how to identify people with the best potential to become your trusted advisors so you can achieve more of what you want in life including greater prosperity, a fulfilling career and better relationships.

Trust Your Brainpower

Did you know that your brain is the only known organism in the entire universe capable of analyzing itself? It weighs in at about a whopping 3 pounds and is equipped with approximately 100 billion neurons that build the networks for memory and problem solving. Your brain has the same potential as the brain of Albert Einstein or any other genius you admire. That means it’s not how many neurons you have but how you use them. Pretty mind blowing, isn’t it?

Your brain takes in sensory information continuously on conscious and unconscious levels. You are bombarded with visual, kinesthetic, auditory, olfactory and taste inputs, even when you sleep. Your memory bank is a rich treasure chest filled with life experiences, facts and figures. It’s your representational system to navigate life. You have the cognitive ability to access memory, continuously learn and improve, solve problems and make decisions. The potential of your brain to achieve what you can imagine, plan and implement is limitless.

A good start to understanding and using your brainpower is determining your sensory and cognitive thinking strengths and “blind spots.” Be sure to select a trustworthy service provider having a statistically validated survey and practical neuroscience tools customized to your sensory score sequences and cognitive thinking preferences.

How to Make Good Personal Decisions

First, decide on the outcomes you want to experience. Be as specific as you can; use numbers, dates, and vivid descriptions of what you really want. Avoid stating what you don’t want as your brain will arrow in on these thoughts and give you more of what you want to avoid.

Next, ask yourself the following questions when looking at the possible solutions: “What looks, feels and sounds the best to me?” “What seems the most logical and at the same time has potential growth and opportunities?” “Will I regret or be happy with this decision in 3 years?” “Will I have caused any harm to myself or others as a result of this decision?” You can trust your brain to give you responses to these questions.

Trusted Advisors Multiply Your Brainpower

Trusted advisors help you achieve your goals faster and with less stress. They fill in the gaps left by what you can’t do or need to learn. Trusted advisors are a comfort when you feel alone. They can also help you make more accurate decisions and avoid potential pitfalls.

Decide, thoughtfully, who your trusted advisors are. These people help you with life challenges regarding finances, childcare, health, career and relationships. The most important criteria for your trusted advisors is that their fundamental values are equal to or higher than yours. Values drive behavior and outcomes. You want advice and ideas that are based on high values that serve you and others in good ways. Be sure your trusted advisors also have the experience and knowledge you need.

You may be surprised at how many of the people you respect and admire will be honored and thrilled to be considered your trusted advisor. Also, ask your trusted advisors how you may be of service to them. You may be stunned by how they view your gifts and what you have to offer them in return for helping you. Giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin.

In conclusion, you need to trust your brain before seeking trusted advisors. Your brain is the most miraculous mass of protoplasm known to mankind. Becoming better acquainted with your brain strengths and “blind spots” actually strengthens them. Neuroplasticity is the mechanism for continuous learning, cognitive problem solving and decision-making. Imagination is your greatest gift, coupled with your ability to take action, to leapfrog your life forward beyond your wildest dreams.

Related Articles

Posted in Career, Education, Family, Personal, Uncategorized | 6 Comments »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
March 23, 2011

Watch Sparks Fly Between Sequential and Global Thinkers

Sparks of fire

Image via Wikipedia

Watch the sparks fly when people, having radically different ways of thinking, interact with one another at work, home and social gatherings. If your cognitive strength is Sequential thinking (e.g. logical and orderly), you likely perceive people with Global thinking strengths as impractical and unrealistic dreamers. If your strength is Global thinking (e.g. imagination and ideating), you may view and describe Sequential thinkers as unoriginal and tedious plodders.

The Destructive Sparks of Judgment

People having similar interests, goals and personality tend to attract one another. Interpersonal conflict occurs when people are not aware of each other’s unique ways to learn, think, work, communicate, solve problems and make decisions. This potential conflict has no boundaries. It occurs between spouses, family members, friends and co-workers. Love, friendship and common goals are not always sufficient for harmonious relationships.

All too often, people hold the opinion that the way they think and process information is the “right way” and perhaps the “only way.” The destructive sparks from people with diverse brain strengths clashing with one another can cause interpersonal conflict and stress. Clashes like this also limit the possibility of mutual understanding and growth. These are the sparks of judgment and closed minds. Left unattended, they result in divorce, wounded relationships and unhappy careers.

Subtle and Big Dangers

People having the same cognitive thinking strengths often get along with one another and experience high levels of rapport and agreement. Similar thinking strengths attract. The absence of “sparks” gives them a false sense of security that all is well and they are on the right path. The danger is that they may be operating in a lopsided cognitive manner and missing a whole brained approach to life and what they are doing together.

Sequential Cognitive Thinking “Blind Spots”

Sequential thinkers’ “blind spots” are what they pay least attention to and are the strengths of Global thinkers. Sequential thinkers tend to approach projects and problems in an organized and logical manner, overlooking the larger sphere of options and possibilities. Their focus and attention to detail, order, accuracy and timeliness shunts their attention from context, purpose and desired outcomes. While being highly productive and keeping within budget, sequential thinkers may not give adequate time thinking about the bigger picture, what’s changing in the world, optimum direction and best ways to proceed. They may miss seeing both risks and opportunities around them due to their “blind spots.”

Global Cognitive Thinking “Blind Spots”

Global thinkers’ “blind spots” are Sequential thinkers’ strengths. Global thinkers approach their personal and professional life from an orientation to the future. They live in their imagination doing creative problem solving, ideating new possibilities and inventing things. Global thinkers’ focus on future outcomes tends to isolate them from the practicalities of what needs to be accomplished to achieve the outcome they envision. Global “blind spots” include absence of time requirements, logic, orderliness, realism, identifying obstacles, getting other people on-board with their ideas and developing a comprehensive tactical implementation plan. Global thinkers have challenges getting single tasks accomplished with high levels of productivity.

The Challenge

The challenge is to acknowledge, respect and join global and sequential cognitive thinking strengths to create a “whole brain” approach. This applies to all human interactions from intimate relationships to entire organizations. Joining minds of diverse strengths is the key to creating positive and sustainable change through continuous improvement. The challenge involves suspending judgment that one way of thinking is the best way and to embrace brain strength diversity. Integrous people know and leverage their strengths and the strengths of others.

In Conclusion

People who know how to identify, align with and leverage each other’s brain strengths experience rapport and understanding. They solve problems, make sound decisions and move mountains. Brains working together collaboratively are like millions of spark plugs creating new neuro-pathways where every participant is a benefactor. The effect is radically different from watching sparks fly from people not acknowledging, respecting and leveraging each other’s brain strengths.

Related Articles

Posted in Career, Education, Family, Personal, Uncategorized | 1 Comment »

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,
« Older Entries  |  
Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,013 other followers