Communication Skills Made Simple
Image by cheerfulmonk via Flickr
My goal is to reveal everything I have learned about communication success, so you will have better relationships with everyone, particularly with the difficult people in your life. I have been working in the field of practical neuroscience since 1992, with Deanna Phelps, my business and life partner. We have simplified science-based communication practices that increase rapport and understanding with nearly anyone.
Isn’t it amazing, despite our technological advances, that we still have nagging and persistent problems communicating with our partners, parents, children, friends and the people we work with? What if you could transform your difficult relationships into great relationships, built from bonds of understanding and respect?
These principles will help you analyze and understand your relationships:
- People you have great relationships with are most likely those who share some of your characteristics. This is the basis of membership clubs and small start-up businesses.
- People you have difficult relationships with are most likely very different than you. These people probably have good relationships with people like themselves.
- Everyone is unique due to his or her personality, life experiences, opinions, and brain wiring to receive and process information. Diversity is strength when we respect and use it for good purposes.
- People do things and respond for their reasons, not yours. Don’t take everything so personally.
- Everyone, despite what you may think, is doing the very best they can with their state-of-mind (in any given moment) and the internal resources available to deal with what is going on. Be more compassionate.
I hope you agree that the main purposes of communications are:
- Understanding one another
- Learning and teaching
- Sharing points-of-view
- Providing information
- Giving instructions and directions
- Making decisions
- Solving problems
When you and another person acknowledge and accept one or more of these desired outcomes you are more likely to succeed. This one simple act establishes the real and noble purposes of communication. Displacing “getting your way,” “being right” and “driving home your point-of-view” eliminates 90%, or more, of the problems that create anger, frustration, confusion, push-back and wasted time.
Once you have agreed on the topic and the purpose of the interaction, the remaining activity is exchanging information on each other’s wavelength. This process transcends personality and behavioral differences. It simplifies communication and saves valuable time.
The science-based principles of communication rapport are based on brain wiring.
1. Communicate on each other’s strongest sensory pathways:
Visual Learners Need: Visual media, Key Written Points, Pictures, Graphics, Images, Color, Clutter-free Environment
Kinesthetic Learners Need: Physical Activity, Hands-on Experiences, Comfort, Freedom to Move,Frequent Breaks
Auditory Learners Need: Clarity of Words, Attentive Listening, Ability to Ask Questions, Quiet Environment
2. Present sensory information in ways can make sense of it.
Sequential Thinkers (“left brain”) Need: Logic, Order, Particulars, Realism, Practicality, Data, Schedules, Content
Global Thinkers (”right brain”) Need: Possibilities, Options, Generalities, Open-ended, Big Picture, Context
I have attempted to demystify and simplify the communication process. The first step of establishing desired outcomes helps displace emotional and egotistical elements that waste time and create problems. The second step of communicating on each other’s wavelength is based on sound, safe and respected neuroscience research. Please try these true and proven ways to increase communication rapport and understanding. Enjoy the journey.
Author Message:
You may not be aware that our organization is a trusted and respected source of reliable practical neuroscience solutions for personal and organizational development. We have been creating and delivering brain-based human development solutions, since 1992. The message that follows directs you to a quick, easy, and low cost solution you may be searching for.
Are you experiencing strained and difficult communications with a family member, co-worker or friend? Feeling misunderstood and unappreciated are tell-tale signs of a deteriorating relationship. Your difficulties may be due to big gaps in the ways you both communicate. Or, perhaps you just want to take your communication skills to a higher level. Your Brain PathWays report gives you what you need to know and do to get on other peoples “wavelength.” You can repair, rebuild and improve important relationships now with powerful practical neuroscience communication tools for exceptional rapport. Click to purchase your Brain PathWays online self-assessment and download your report today.
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I absolutely enjoy your topics. Communication is so valuable and it is also something that is often missing when it comes to people on different sides of an issue. I have been slowly teaching myself self awareness in conversations. I employed some of your listening techniques and have since been in several very very long one sided conversations and the people really seamed to open up and talk about things that I felt were a little too personal but I had patience and took the time to give them that ventilation. My question to you would be…Could it be possible that we subconsciously become habitually poor listeners when we are routinely pressed for time? If so could forcing yourself to take the time to listen to others actually reduce stress levels by making us feel as though we are less hurried? Just some ideas that crossed my mind in the past week. Have a smile on me…it’s free!
Thank you for your comments. I enjoyed reading your take on practical neurosience and how it applies to your life. I am happy that you are trying some of the listening methods recommended. Please let us know how they worked. In regards to your question, I agree with you that our brains subconsciously “check-out” of listening when we are pressed for time. We also dion’t listen when we are not interested in the subject or the person. The brain only engages in activities that have value, benefits or emotional “juice.” Does this make sense? Thanks again and keep your comments flowing.
Best regards,
Stephen
Yes…I believe what you say whole hardheartedly! I was wondering if the practice of being pressed for time might habitually create a pattern that tunes out more than we would actually like…If that is the case …the link between focus and pressure would be direct would it not? Just thinking about the subject…perhaps a little too much 🙂
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